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10 things you can do right now to feel better + learn the energetics of the situation
10 things you can do right now to feel better + learn the energetics of the situation
Did you know the word ‘Corona’ translates to Crown?
The seven chakras of our energetic body.
The crown of your head is the highest part of your physical body, but the same applies to energy. If you’re unfamiliar with the subtle body, it consists of 7 primary chakras, or energy fields (the word ‘chakra’ translates to wheel and refers to how the energy moves and spins in the energy center).
These chakras are all connected to different areas and aspects of ourselves, our physical bodies and our lives. All of these correspond to functions of different organs. The chakra system runs along the spine and is connected to our nervous system. The first primary chakra is located at the base of our spine and is connected to our sense of survival, our home, our finances and everything we need in our lives in order to feel stable, grounded and supported. The second energy center, located by the reproductive organs, is connected to creation, creativity, sensuality and sexuality. The third energy center is linked to our ego, our core, our sense of self and sits in our solar plexus. The fourth is the heart center, our center for love. The fifth energy center i connected to expression, communication and truth, located at the throat. The sixth sits between our eyebrows and is connected to vision, intuition and wisdom. And the seventh and last one is our sense of unity, belonging, connection. The seventh and last chakra is considered to be the highest chakra representing higher consciousness and unity. You can think of it more as WE energy instead of a ME mindset. It’s what brings us all together and connects us all into one. Interestingly enough, this virus also carries its name.
For a long time already, humanity has been dormant and in darkness. Blindsided to our own greed, actions and choices, we’ve reached a point where our planet is hurting. Here’s the thing, everything is energy and everything has its tipping point. The energy we all hold individually also gathers and forms together into what is called a collective consciousness. This collective consciousness holds our shared beliefs, thoughts and ideas. This collective consciousness has been napping, for well, quite some time now. But now, we’re being told to wake the *insert whatever strong word of your liking* up in a very real way, that surely affects us all in some way or form. The coronavirus is on everyone's lips and minds right now. We’re all talking about the myriad of ways of how it’s touching our lives and worry for our health, finances and the insecure future. As horrible as the situation might feel, this is also an opportunity for change and to become united.
When you think of the virus from an energetic point of view, one could say it pierces through our heart center, both through how it actually affects the people who get sick and also through causing anxiety (that is often felt in the chest through heart palpations or pressure) for many others. In a more Western view we know that the virus attacks the lungs. We know that the virus spreads through touch and physical closeness. These are also aspects of the heart chakra. The heart chakra is connected to the element of air, our lungs and breathing. The sense that is connected to the heart chakra is our sense of touch and the virus also spreads through both the air and through our biggest organ, our skin, again, both connected to the heart center. Emotions that are connected to the heart chakra are; grief, sadness, compassion, love, joy and balance.
And clearly we’ve been living out of balance for a long time already. When this energy enters our hearts it drops down to the root chakra, where many of us might feel compromised currently. We feel a rush of fear take over, as our root chakra is connected to our adrenal glands and to our sense of survival. It’s interesting when you think of people’s reactions and how their primal instinct is to hoard toilet paper and groceries, which are all very basic needs. A primitive reaction, but very understandable when you think at it from an energetic point of view.
In yogic philosophy we are taught how the Kundalini energy sits at the base of our spine and by rising it up to the crown chakra we can become united. In order to reach samadhi or higher consciousness (lift the energy to the crown chakra), our lower chakras need to be in balance and harmony, so that the higher chakras can also open. In order for us to balance this, we need to take care of ourselves, our mutual home, our planet, and each other, and now more than ever so. We need to start building the energy from the bottom up, so that we can feel united and lift the energy up to the crown chakra, our last and seventh chakra and become united. We need to start with the basics.
We’ve clearly been exploiting mama earth and too focused on the material plane (first chakra), which is why now we are being shaken to the core in this energy center. This overcompensation and exploitation of natural resources has no reached a point, where we have an opportunity for change, to become more united. Interestingly enough, from an energetic point of view, when you think about the origin of where the virus stems from, it’s from a food market with animal products. And this is part of the problem and key causes of global warming: animal agriculture. We’ve been consuming and using meat and animal products that are not necessary for all to live and particularly in the amounts that many are consuming. The heavy and toxic energy from dead animals transforms to energy too, which is something we’ve been carrying in our fields of energy.
Now, we are asked to to wake up, think about our choices when it comes to consumerism, our diet and health. But without being too hard on ourselves. Surely there’s a bigger picture here at play and a call for a collective wake up. That doesn’t mean you need to stop being human. We are all in this together and we need to come together and support each other, but we also need to take care of ourselves and our health. Fear lowers the immune system, which is why it’s even more important than ever to stay connected to ourselves through self-care, a healthy diet and exercise (did someone say yoga?). You know what else helps; HUMOR. I think just like with everything in life, balance is key. Don’t be hard on yourself for enjoying your Ben & Jerry’s or binge watching your favorite Netflix show, while everyone else is posting their workout videos. Because self-help can mean a lot of different things and this is also a time to rejuvenate, relax and destress. Take this time to do you. And if you’ve had a breakdown or two, that’s okay too (🙋🏼♀️). This is the human experience. I’ve been on an emotional rollercoaster during this time too and just because I am analysing the energetics of the situation, doesn’t mean I have it figured out. But I try to remind myself that, the only constant is change, and this too shall pass and luckily there are ways to work things out.
Here are 10 tips for the handling the situation:
Buy a voucher from a struggling local business.
Boost your immune system & get your vitamins! Tip: If you live in Helsinki, I highly recommend ordering a berry snack in form of a Quarantine package from Bär Bar
Stay connected to your body. Practice yoga & meditate! Tip: You can check out our online community on Facebook with a local studio here in Helsinki. I had a class yesterday for stabilising the Root Chakra
Make sure to maintain healthy diet and get your exercise going! Tip: Check out my fave PT Kanerva Ahonala and her e-course Paremmille Tavoille (Improve your Ways), which is an e-course for making healthier choices with your diet. Only in Finnish tho.
TURN OFF THE NEWS. You don’t need to read every single news there is - instead you can use this energy into something else. read book or listen to ebooks. Tip: If you’re into spirituality or want to learn more, join me and Jonna Monola for our online course Sacred Ceremony with two guided meditations, and ebook and two yoga practices.
Get your creative juices flowing or start a new project/course/hobby: paint, draw, sing, dance. Tip: Here’s a playlist I made to calm down your nervous system. Or sign up for an online class! I just signed up for Yale’s most popular class for free: How to be happier in your daily life
Nature. As long as we are still allowed outside, take a walk or go out for o run. Enjoy the sunshine. I promise you’ll feel better afterwards.
Gratitude. We are privileged. At the end of the day, we are told to stay home, not to go to war. That being said, you’re allowed to feel your feelings so don’t be hard on yourself if you do feel confused, sad, worried or fearful. It’s human, when you feel those lows try to direct your attention to the good stuff you already have.
Call your friends and loved ones. Tip: There’s a bunch of great apps such as Whereby and Houseparty, where you can talk to a group of friends simultaneously and host virtual wine parties/coffee chats or whatnots.
Laughter. There’s a reason they say laughter is the best medicine and I’ve seen some of the best memes ever during this time. A special shoutout to my meme sender and good friend, Eder, who always keeps me supplied with the funniest stuff. Please feel free to share your favorites with me too! Either by commenting or DM on instagram. Here’s a couple of my faves this far:
MOON MAGIC: YOUR MOON 101 GUIDE
MOON MAGIC: Your Moon 101 guide
Happy FULL MOON!
On my birthday I made a post on instagram stating that this year, I will be more authentic. This blog post is as a step towards that direction and a way for me to shed some light on what some of my deepest interests and passions include, which happens to be spirituality, the moon and my connection to it. And what better time to do that than the day the sun fully illuminates the moon, which happens to be today.
It’s interesting how my soul chose to be born in a country where we today are so disconnected from nature and spirituality (and within that same spectrum, also the moon). Growing up in Finland, I’ve throughout my life been conditioned to a society where we are surrounded by systems, order, rules and regulations. Everything is perfectly planned, systemized and scientific. Don’t get me wrong here, I am grateful and aware of my privilege and I do feel lucky to have been born into a country that is so well functioning. But in terms of being connected to nature and its cyclical essence, our surroundings and spirit, I wouldn’t rank Finland very high today. Quite the opposite actually. But it didn’t always used to be that way. Finnish shamanism is one of the oldest shamanic lineages as it stems from the indigenous peoples of Finland; the Finns and the Saami. Both peoples developed rich shamanic traditions, where for instance going to the sauna was seen as a spiritual act (similar to a sweat lodge in Native American culture). The sauna was a sacred ritual and you had to follow the sauna rules. Sauna also had its’ own spirit called löylynhenki. So even if we Finns might seem detached from nature and spirit today, we still have our deep traditions that live and thrive.
Despite us Finns having these deep roots and traditions, to be openly interested in things most people would describe as occult or new age mumbo jumbo, is not always the easiest path. When you mention the idea of aligning your actions with the lunar phases, you might get eye rolls or be ridiculed. On the flipside though, I actually find it sad people are so detached, as they see everything they don’t understand as woo woo. Luckily however, I’ve been fortunate enough to have connected with many like minded people, who understand the ancient wisdom of connecting with la luna and its cycles. When I lived in Mexico, I used to meet up with a couple friends during full moon and new moon. We would go to a very special place overlooking the town of Sayulita to share our deepest desires and hopes and do various ceremonies to connect with the moon. And if I can inspire even one more person to find this connection, this blog post serves a purpose. Aligning your actions with nature is so so powerful.
HOW THE MOON AFFECTS US
As some of you might know, the moon affects the ocean with its tidal pull. If you’re a surfer, it’s helpful to use this information to decide the most ideal time to shred the gnar. What you also might be aware of already, is that the human body consists up to nearly 70% of water. You do the math (moon + water = effect). Another interesting thing to consider is the link between the lunar cycles and menstrual flow. A menstrual cycle lasts 28 days, which is about as long as a moon cycle. The moon takes 27 days, 7 hours, and 43 minutes to complete one round around the earth. Normally, the ovulation happens around full moon, when everything is coming into full circle and fruition and the shedding usually happens around new moon, which is the darkest phase of the moon. When you start to observe your body more you might notice a clear correlation with the celestial events and your menstrual cycle.
The moon has always been a big theme in religions art and rituals. The moon represents powerful feminine energy. It signifies wisdom, intuition, birth, death, reincarnation, and a spiritual connection. Throughout eons of time, peoples across the world have worshipped it and gathered to celebrate the full moon. Each phase of the Moon’s cycle has a unique visual characteristic and spiritual meaning. The lunar phases are also used in agriculture as these same forces affect the water content of the soil, creating more moisture in the soil at the time of the new and full moon. This increased moisture encourages the seeds to sprout and grow. The lunar cycle is like the cycle of a seed: it grows up into a flower, it blooms and then it dies.
Meditate and center yourself during a full moon to connect with yourself. Pic: Vuokko Salo
We are all capable of attuning with the moons energies and activating our inner power. The lunar cycle is made up of different stages.
Traditionally the full moon and the new moon are considered to be the most potent phases to align with the moon. There is a myriad of ways you can work and connect with the moon through intention and ceremony. Each month of the year also holds a specific symbolic meaning for each full moon as well as the weekday it falls upon. The full moon also falls each month in a different astrological sign and you can learn specifically about each full moon and its themes. As there is so much to dive into, I’ve gathered a simplified list here below of the different lunar phases of one moon cycle about what the various phases represent and what you can do in order to connect with them.
New Moon
New moons represent new beginnings. The Moon is positioned between the Earth and Sun so it cannot be seen from Earth.
WHAT TO DO: This is a time to start new projects and phases within your life.
Waxing Crescent Moon
This phase signifies intention. ‘Waxing’ means the moon’s illumination is growing, and ‘Crescent’ means less than half of the moon is illuminated.
WHAT TO DO: Write a list of your intentions and keep them in mind. What things do you want to accomplish or get done?
First Quarter Moon
This phase signifies decision making. Exactly half of the Moon is illuminated and the other half is shadowed.
WHAT TO DO: During this phase spend extra time making decisions.
Waxing Gibbous Moon
This moon phase signifies purification. ‘Waxing’ means the Moon’s illumination is growing and ‘Gibbous’ means more than half of the Moon is illuminated.
WHAT TO DO: Assess your goals and figure out what is working for you right now and what may need to change.
Full Moon
Fruition, completion, bloom, release and sealing of intention. The Sun illuminates the entire moon.
WHAT TO DO: This is a the time to set goals and make any promises to yourself on a soul level. If there are any areas that no longer serve you, it is time to let go of them.
Waning Gibbous
Gratitude. ‘Waning’ refers to the decreasing of the Moon’s illumination, and ‘Gibbous’ means more than half of Moon illuminated.
WHAT TO DO: Make a list of all the things you are grateful for.
The full moon is a powerful time for looking within, for healing and shifting. A great way to channel these energies is through a sound bath. Pic: Vuokko Salo
Third Quarter
Forgiveness. Exactly half of the Moon is illuminated and the other half is shadowed. We will see the opposite side than the First Quarter Moon.
WHAT TO DO: Use this time to forgive others and forgive yourself.
Waning Crescent
Surrender. ‘Waning’ refers to the shrinking of the Moon’s illumination, and ‘Crescent’ means less than half of the Moon is illuminated.
WHAT TO DO: Spend time being mindful, going with the flow and surrendering to the world around you.
February Snow Supermoon 2020
Like I mentioned above, each full moon has a specific theme and meaning. The February’s moon is the Snow Moon. In the northern hemisphere, this name reflects the time when winter is in full force. This moon has other names as well such as the Hunger Moon, Storm Moon, and Chaste Moon.
This specific full moon falls upon the sign of Leo and is a supermoon, meaning the moon appears to be closer to earth. The theme for this full moon is passion, motivation and shining brightly, burning away anything that stands in front of you from achieving your deepest desires. Leos like to be in the spotlight and this full moon is a time for all of us to embrace our inner Leos and celebrate ourselves. As full moons represents fruition and/or completition, it’s a great time to look back at all you’ve accomplished.
This full moon also has the moon trine Mars aspect. This condition helps us to acknowledge the fears that have been holding us back,and the things we have tried to avoid resolving. This creates a new setting for change and progress. The projects that we start during this Full Moon will blossom into something truly beautiful. So if you’ve been waiting for a sign, let this be it. Source & read more here.
How do you connect with the moon?
It’s been a while since I wrote my last guide. Let me know if you enjoy these posts or you have any topic you’d want me to write about.
Con amor,
Eva
Follow your bliss: Why I quit my job
FOLLOW YOUR BLISS: WHY I QUIT MY JOB
One of the biggest struggles for me has always been decision making. Be it big or small, I find myself pondering the options and outcomes way too long. Lately though, I feel as the universe has been handing me big platters of decision making practice and I am slowly honing this skill and becoming more intuitive, especially when it comes to decision making for myself.
I feel like I’ve always been pretty gifted in seeing and supporting my peers in the right direction for their highest self, but when it comes to myself, it’s often been foggy, messy and uncertain. Luckily though and like I wrote in a previous blog text on my decision to relocate back to Finland (after having lived in Mexico for nearly seven years), I am slowly learning to listen to that squeaky little internal voice and whisper (before it becomes a roar).
After moving back to Finland, I quickly started working with event production. It was a massive change coming from the laid back beach life style and after having been my own boss and working within wedding planning and the hospitality and wellness industry in the tropics. All of a sudden I found myself in a hectic corporate world with completely new tasks, in a new environment and with a very different client base. With a pace where your daily hours run out and you add darkness, cold weather and adjusting to Finnish culture and customs into the mix, you have yourself one exhausted gal. And when exhaustion happens, energy shifts.
This shift manifested in many ways; I started experiencing bodily stress symptoms such as eye twitching, bloating and even mood swings. My body knew before my head did, it was time to slow down and change direction. It was simply way too much and way too fast. I did my best to keep pushing through as I didn’t want to give up and I thought to myself that maybe things would change for the better as there was a vague silver lining in foresight. When things didn’t fall through as I had hoped, I finally decided to resign. It was time to breakthrough my fears and leave the secure corporate world for the unknown world of entrepreneurship.
“My body knew before my head did, it was time to slow down and change direction.”
Letting the dead leaves drop.
Follow your bliss.
Because what it all comes down to is time. And life is short. The time you have in this precious life is scarce and your days are limited. As cliche as it may sound, if you’re not going to chase your dreams or try something you’ve always dreamt of, you’ll probably regret it later in life. Sure, it’s risky, crazy and nerve wrecking, but for me it is absolutely necessary and having regrets later is not an option. There’s also the benefit of working with what you love and on your own terms and you get to enjoy a whole new level of personal, professional and financial freedom. Besides, being an entrepreneur is not completely new to me as I used to work for myself also while living in Mexico. That being said, in all honesty, there’s a huge difference in running a business in Mexico compared to Finland. But, I am up for the challenge and more importantly, I simply have to give it a go.
I also believe in the phrase “todo pasa por algo”, meaning everything happens for a reason. I needed to go through this year to get clarity on what it is that I want to pursue and what is truly important to me. I am extremely grateful for this almost one year that I worked with a lovely team and for the fact that I get to call my ex colleagues not just my former co-workers, but friends. We had a good run and I truly wish the team all the best of luck and success in the future.
You know, it’s interesting now in hindsight reflect upon my decision and notice how big decisions and releases tend to happen around fall. There’s wisdom in nature and just like the trees you can let the dead leaves drop. You release and shed and let go of the things that did not serve you for something new and better.
So what does the future hold for me right now you might ask? Well, I am going to work with the things I love; yoga (corporate yoga classes, privates, studio classes and yoga retreats), wellness, copywriting, content creation and marketing. I am very open to new opportunities and projects and if you see that there is something we could work on together, make sure to drop me a line. I will also be launching something I’ve always dreamt of, so stay tuned for this secret I am revealing in the near future. Oh, but first things first, I am heading to Mexico to enjoy life on the beach for the darkest month of the year; November.
Let me know if you’ve made any similar transition or have any tips, tricks or input on this scary journey that I am about to embark. I would love to hear from you!
Stay tuned,
Con amor and excitement for this new chapter,
Eva
SUMMER UPDATE: What I've been up to lately + how to listen to your body
Dear reader, thanks for circling back to my blog even after this mini break that I’ve taken. The reason for the little pause is very simple: I’ve needed time to recharge, reset and relax. I definitely still believe in the practice of commitment and consistency with blogging, but what’s even more important than that (or more valuable than SEO optimising), is to truly learn to wind down when you need to. And I feel like this is something many of us can relate to. People (we) need to stop glorifying being busy and make room for, well, nothingness. Can’t we just please start a new trend where doing nothing is the coolest thing on planet earth 😅!? No but, jokes aside I feel that especially as a yoga teacher and someone who teaches people to unwind and tune in with themselves, I also need to practice it, not just preach it. And that’s exactly what I am doing right now, sitting in my summer cabin overlooking the Baltic Sea and simply taking it super chill without any schedule nor plans. Thanks to taking this time for myself I’ve now finally felt inspired and energized again to start writing and I started to reflect over how much I’ve actually needed this, to just be still without the hustle and bustle of the city life.
Lately I’ve been spending a lot of time here at our summer cabin, which is just an hour outside of Helsinki. We are in the midst of remodelling a small cute summer cabin (the sauna house) and making it into a space for me and my boyfriend. It’s been a bigger project than we first anticipated but I won’t go too much into detail right now as I am dedicating a full blog post to it very soon (with before and after pics, so stay tuned!!). In addition to spending time here, I’ve also been to a friends summer cabin celebrating midsummer and then enjoyed a fun and wild weekend in Hankoo (the most southern city in Finland) with an amazing group of friends. I’ve also taught a few yoga classes, gone to an amusement park (Linnanmäki), but other than that it’s been down time and laying low. And lemme tell ya, it’s been very needed. I feel like I am still digesting my new life of living back in Finland and trying to rejuvenate from the heavy winter and the busyness of it all (my day job as an event planner can be pretty hectic). Luckily, I am planning to escape this winter for at least parts of it.
At Linnanmäki, pic by Jonna Monola. Pants Vimma Company.
So how do we make sure to stay energized, healthy and balanced without burning out or over exhausting ourselves? What it all comes down to is learning to listen to your body and knowing when to slow down. I wanted to share some practical tips I’ve found to be useful as I’ve learned that my body is often way smarter than my head let alone my silly ego. The thing with your body versus your mind is that the body is continuously giving you cues and subtle messages on what is good for you and what isn’t, the problem is just that we a) ignore them or b) don’t see these messages in the first place. The mind loves to come up with excuses, distractions and falsities. Listening to your body or yourself is applicable to not just your health, but any other area of your life as well. If you just learn to tune into your intuition and gut feeling more than staying in your head, you’ll start noticing how things unfold in a very different way.
But what if you don’t know how to listen or you don’t know what actually works for your body, then a phrase like “listen to your body” can feel like nagging or plain useless. The truth is we are all different. Not only through our unique lives, patterns, relationships, circumstances, jobs, living situations, rhythms, eating & sleeping habits, we also differ in what our idea of health is. So where does one start? I made a few key notes that I feel that can be helpful on this journey towards becoming more self aware.
Pic: Chiara Hammerer Watch: Aarni Woods
Every day make sure to have a quiet moment just for yourself where you ask yourself these three questions: What am I feeling, physically? What am I feeling, emotionally? What am I thinking? Pay attention to what comes up. Just like with any new skill, this will be a process and some days you’ll get answers right away when at times you’ll think about your neighbours dead cat. Lol.
Journal first thing in the morning for 30 days straight. Commit to this practice and write two pages each morning before anything else. You’ll be astonished at how much will come up.
If you feel like you need to learn to listen to your body more think about the why’s. Why do you want to listen to your body. What is it, that is not working for you? Do you perhaps already have some physical symptoms such as tiredness, headaches, bloating, insomnia, lack of energy, a disoriented body image, relationship issues, lack of drive or direction. Or anything else that does not sit right with you. Think about your goals. What are you hoping to achieve? Is there a specific goal you want to reach, such as a more balanced relationship with food or better stress-reduction habits? Why is this important to you? Any goal is most successful when grounded in purpose.
Meditation, yoga or any other practice, exercise or hobby that helps you connect with yourself.
SLOW DOWN. Your health is your greatest wealth and priority. If you don’t know where to start or everything else sounds like gibberish, this one is pretty simply. Just clear your calendar, baby steps.
Pic: Chiara Hammerer
Towards a healthier, happier mind body connection y’all.
Happy trails and summer smiles!
Con amor,
Evita
PS. I will be posting more often from now on now that I am feeling energized again, pinky swear!
Boundaries & the art of saying no
Boundaries & the art of saying no
(Aka The Murican word that we also need to learn to incorporate into our lives here in the North)
Beautiful clothing by Finnish company Vimma and photography by Jonna Monola
Today I felt the need to write about boundaries. How do we inforce healthy boundaries in our relationships (personal, work and romantic) and communicate them to other people wisely. It’s a thought-provoking topic and something I’ve at times personally struggled with. I am still learning to draw the line in certain areas of my life and unfortunately more too often than I’d like to admit, I have a tendency of being just a little too floppy which will result in me feeling drained.
Firstly, if you’re unfamiliar with the word ”boundary” or wording ”having boundaries”, what this refers to are your personal limits and guidelines (your rules so to speak) that you establish to identify reasonable, safe and permissible ways for other people to behave towards you. It also refers to how you will respond when someone passes those limits. Think about them as your invisible fences you have around certain matters. These boundaries can involve how you want to be treated in a romantic relationship, how you wish to be treated at work or just with other people period. Your boundaries are not static and they are also constantly being shaped and created and tend to shift over time.
News flash: people cross our boundaries constantly. What it basically means is that we are imperfect people living in an imperfect world with other imperfect fellow humans. Our boundaries will get crossed as at some point someone will do, say or ask for something that does not feel right to you. Despite the mundane nature of having boundaries, I had never heard of the expression before moving to Mexico and befriending a bunch of Americans/Canadians. It’s simply not a word that is used enough in our Scandinavian culture. Thus, I feel like it needs to be addressed more, hence today’s lil blog post. Because at the end of the day what it comes down to is having the balls/ovaries of saying no when we don’t feel like it. Why one might ask, well the truth is, people are sick and tired, and way too many people in our society burn out due to their boundaries being crossed over and over again. But this is not just in the world of biz, maybe you’ll notice it in your personal life or perhaps even in your romantic life. Just a tiny example is if when you feel obligated to for instance attend an event you don’t want to go to but you go anyways. What this comes down to is your lack of boundaries/ your lack of communicating them. As you start to see, your boundaries are part of your everyday life in many areas as they determine what works for you and what doesn’t.
Some argue that having healthy and clear boundaries has a dirrect correlation with your self-esteem. I agree to a certain extent, but I think it’s more complicated than that. It also has to do with self awareness, your communication skills and the idea of being a ”yes (wo)man” or plain simple, just being too darn nice. In the corporate world there might be a myriad of reasons why someone is allowing the workload to keep piling up. Perhaps the person is afraid of losing their job, perhaps they are hoping for a promotion etc. The thing is, it’s not just black and white.
So how do we create healthy, reasonable boundaries? Good question. I am no master as I honestly like I mentioned, still battle with this myself, but, I have gathered a few tricks and tips under my belt. Below shared:
1. Gain clarity and learn to check in with yourself. Watch your emotions, feelings, energy level, mood, thoughts. If you’re feeling exhausted or drained, the odds are something is sucking the life out of you. If you notice yourself feeling resentment towards someone or something, most likely you need to change something. Recap of step one: become aware.
2. When you’ve pin pointed a situation where you’re unhappy or feel like someone is taking advantage of you or doing anything else that triggers you, mark it mentally. Figure out what, exactly, you're comfortable with and what you aren't. Step two is about learning about and setting your limits.
3. Make self care your priority. I’ve said this before, but the most important relationship you’ll ever have is the one you have with yourself. Put yourself first. For realz. Step three is taking your power back and wanting to change things.
4. Communication (surpise surprise!). Once you get clear on what matters most to you, then you can take the bigger step of communicating this to others. As hard as it is, you’ll have to verbalize where you stand and perhaps even break it down for others to understand where you’re coming from. Be direct. Like we’ve seen on Pinterest and the gram, growth (and sometimes change!) happen outside of the comfort zone. Step four in a nutshell: take action.
5. Baby steps. Just like with learning any new skill, it takes practice and courage. Start small and be assertive when communicating what you’re okay with and what not. Step five is a reminder of how you can be strict, yet soft at the same time.
6. Reach out. Sometimes we need a lil push/kick or enouragement from our peers, friends or fam. Talk to them about your feels and perhaps you’ll gain some new insight or another perspective around your issue. At the end of the day, we are all different and how we perceive the world is our reality. By changing perspective, your whole situation might change. Step six is a reminder that you’re not alone, ask for help.
What’s important to understand is that everyone has their own set of boundaries and we are all responsible for holding them and also sensing and respecting other people’s boundaries. As I am typing this I am also realizing how nuanced this topic is and how it actually affets all areas of our lives constantly. We have boundaries in all areas of life: emotional, career, relationship, physical, sexual and the list goes on. Like with all things in life, it takes some time for your patterns of boundaries to develop, and it may take some time to relearn and practice something differently, consistency is key.
Now, I’d love to hear from you. How do you communicate your boundaries without upsetting someone? Do you struggle with this issue? Do you find it easier to have clear boundaries in some areas of your life, but in others not so much?
With love and healthy boundaries,
Eva
Get to know the girl behind the screen // 15 random facts you (probably) didn't know about me
15 facts you (probably) didn’t know about me
and didn’t care about in the first place…
Or maybe you do or did. Either way, I recently saw a post on my insta feed of my good friend and talented photographer, Jessica, where she posted a list of funny things about herself as an introduction. This inspired me to do the same, so without further ado, I decided to give it a whirl.
Proof of me juggling, well kind of. Pic: Jess Leigh
I’m Finnish Swedish
I am from Helsinki, Finland and a part of the 6 % minority of Swedish speaking Finns – I speak Swedish with my dad, Finnish with my mom. In addition to these two native tongues, as I lived in Sayulita, Mexico for nearly 7 years; I learned Spanish, I also understand French semi-fluently and well, English is a given. Another randomness for good measure: I lived in Bali, Indonesia, during my studies and during that time I could understand Bahasa Indonesia pretty decently (today, not so much, I only remember Terimakasahi).
In addition to yoga… I also like the gym, cute surfable waves, swimming, short runs (not marathons), long walks on the beach and berry picking (does that count as a sport?).
My favorite TV shows include…
Game of Thrones (duh) and The Office. Actually, if you’re in a dark place in your life or need any anti depressant, try watching a couple seasons of The Office and I can assure you, you’ll be in a better place.
I am highly sensitive and perceptive and have razor sharp intuition. I usually get a pretty good feel on wether people and situations can be trusted. That being said, there’s definitely also been some misjudgment and I’ve been burnt a handful of times.
I know how to juggle.
Only with three balls tho. Still pretty cool if I may say so myself.
I love to paint and draw!
I usually paint naked women and eyes. Why? Go figure.
I have a Master’s degree in Science (Economics)
Yup, I graduated from the Swedish School of Economics (Hanken) in Helsinki and I studied Marketing as my major, my minor was Spanish and Business Mgmt & Organization. I wrote my thesis about wellness tourism (no surprise there).
I’m currently working on or working with…
Event production (day job), various collaboration projects including the podcast I co-host, a yoga retreat in Mexico, corporate yoga classes, revamping our summer cabin by the sea and a secret super cool project that will be launched later this year (stay tuned, will ya).
I’m not allergic to anything (as far as I know)….
And my plan is to keep it this way. I’ve never been tested tho (well I don’t remember at least).
A lion once wanted to eat me as a snack.
True story. We were in Zimbabwe on a safari, luckily my mom’s friend pulled my down a cliff and there was a feeble fence in between.
I’ve been stung by a scorpion
And it hurt like a mother*** Seriously, worst pain I’ve ever felt. Imagine neuro toxin running through your body in waves and not being able to breath simultaneously. Ouch.
I am a cat and a dog person and my cat got eaten by a python.
And yes, you can be both a cat and a dog person. And yes, my cat got eaten by a python in Mexico. I know. It’s pretty dark.
My favorite color is…
purple, lavender, lilac, magneta, violet, plum. You get it.
My favorite flower is…
THE SUNFLOWER. GIMME. I love the Spanish name “Girasol” the one who turns towards the sun.
I love warm water.
The ocean or a hot tub, I’m there.
Warm water, yes please. Pic: Jenn Farmer
K, that’s all for now.
Love,
Evita
My first poem online
Making peace with the past - a poem by me (my very first online poem).
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There is so much, yet somehow nothing to say.
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It all took me where I am today.
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The tears. The loss. The pain.
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I know, it was never in vain.
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Forever within me it will stay.
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And in all honesty I don’t even want it to go away.
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Because even if I broke,
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and wanted to choke.
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I somehow found my way home.
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To my safe little dome.
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The space that is within me.
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I learned to to see.
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The power that I hold.
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It made me bold.
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Now I am strong,
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and I know I’ve also done things wrong.
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This is not to blame.
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This is not to shame.
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And it sure the hell is not a game.
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I needed you, the past.
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You helped me cast,
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The path that I am on now.
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So let me just say wow and
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Thank you.
Picture by Vuokko Salo in Sayulita, Mexico
10 things I’ve (re)learned after having relocated to Helsinki
10 things I’ve (re)learned after having relocated to Helsinki, Finland
Some of you might already know that I spent a big chunk of my twenties residing in a beautiful vibrant little beach town called Sayulita. Sayulita is located in the state of Nayarit on the Pacific coast of Mexico, just an hour North of Puerto Vallarta. Sayulita is a very magical town and holds a strong energetic pull. I can talk about Sayulita for days, so I’m just going to leave it at that for now and make a completely different blog post about Sayulita and its magic later on. So when I say that Sayulita is a small town, I mean REALLY, really small. If you go visit and ask a random person in town (given that it’s a local, not a tourist), “hey do you know Eva from Finland”, the odds are quite high that the person does know me or know of me. This will perhaps give you a better idea of what I am referring to when I say small.
Living on the other side of the world in a completely different culture, mindset, and country with a different language, different customs, and traditions truly left its mark on me and it definitely shaped me as a person a lot. In all honesty, I am somewhat Mexecuted (all my Sayulita friends will understand this expression) for the rest of my life. What that means is I am kind of “fucked” as my heart is torn between two different places. Life tends to have a plan and I am simply following it as it is, so you will never know where it will take you, you’ll just have to flow with it.
So flowing with life is what I did. It’s funny now thinking back of a time when I swore I’d never return to Finland, well, I guess they’re right when they say never say never. It’s been an interesting journey to come back to this lifestyle and there’s definitely been some adjustment issues and challenges trying to mold back into this kind of living. I mean for starters, it’s cold as FUCK or at least right now. Well, luckily there are good things too. So I made a fun little list of some of the things that I’ve noticed after having returned back to Finland. Some of them I obviously knew before too, but I guess I am wearing a new pair of goggles after having lived in Mexico.
The funny thing is though, that Helsinki, Finland and Sayulita, Mexico are the complete opposites, in every.single.way. Lemme give you a few examples for starters: Finland: cold Mexico: hot, Finland: organized, Mexico: not organized, Finland: don’t salute your neighbors, Mexico: tell the coconut man about your dental issues. And the list goes on and on. So this blog post is a collection of these little observations and differences for you to enjoy. Please keep in mind that these are my personal remarks and I hope you take them with a grain of salt. My intention is not to offend anyone that represents either part of the two cultures and I truly love both cultures, countries and customs a lot. So here ya go:
1. People expect you to always be on time, they get upset if you’re 5 min late
Okay, seriously Mirkku, take a chill pill, scroll thru the gram, 5 minutes is only 5 minutes. If we were in Mex, I wouldn’t have even left my house yet. Sure sure sure, some of you might argue that it’s selfish and rude to make someone wait and I get it… but 5 minutes, seriously!? Anyways, I’ve noticed as a custom you’re supposed to let the person know that you’re meeting that you’re 5 minutes late. This will make it more tolerable and acceptable. Anyways, some of you Sayulitans might smile.
2. People mean what they say
So you know when you bump in to a person on the streets of Sayulita that you somehow (weird huh) haven’t seen in a while and you say to each other “we should catch up and hang out sometime, maybe grab a coffee”. When you say this in Finland they will literally pull out their calendar and set a date. It’s kinda nice to know that you can trust what someone is saying they actually mean and people don’t just say things to because it sounds nice.
3. There is no small talk
I love small talk. I love chit chatting about random things, talking to strangers and I truly enjoy it. It’s a nice way to acknowledge the other person and exchange some words or thoughts. Not just that, it will make time pass way faster if you’re in a bus, elevator or anywhere were you might be waiting for something. But unfortunately Finns don’t do it, they keep to themselves and think that you’re crazy person if you talk to them. I am trying my best tho and will keep chatting, even if they think I am crazy and have no friends (sometimes that’s the assumption). Luckily, however, there has been some positive change lately as Helsinki is becoming more international and the traveling Finns might not be completely turned off if you start talking to them.
4. November equals death, it’s simply the worst month. Run. Escape. Avoid it at all costs
As much as some people in Sayulita might hate the rainy season of July through Sept, lemme tell ya you haven’t experienced November in Finland. I made the novice mistake of coming here in November (dumb dumb) and holy fuck, what the actual fuck was that. Not only was it cold, but the worst thing was the lack of light. Because there is none. NONE. Let me repeat that and let it sink in. No daylight. Well, maybe like a couple hours each day, but nearly no day light. It’s the complete opposite in June though, the sun won’t set and the sun is shining 24/7. The thing for me is that the amount of light has a direct correlation with my mood and energy level. I felt as if someone had just pulled the plug on me. So my advise is, if you live in Finland and want to feel like a human being, escape November. There’s not really any other way. I already made my escape plan and next November you’ll find me in Sayulita sipping margs, doing yoga and soaking in the sun. Come with if you also need to escape this crazy month that people somehow survive. Srsly how do they do it?
5. The tap water is pretty amazing
The drinking water in Finland is the cleanest water on planet earth. I shit you not. It’s cleaner than the bottled water you buy in grocery stores anywhere and we even use it to flush down the poo poo and pee pee. Yes, that same drinkable, beautiful, delicious water goes down the toilet. This is one of the cool things about living in an organized place, little perks like drinkable, clean water. In Sayulita there are days when there just simply isn’t ANY water in the entire town, for days. When you live in a place like Sayulita, you learn to truly appreciate the things Finns take for granted. So wow on the tap water in Finland.
In Finland always loving Mexico. Photo taken at Flow Festival last summer.
6. The trash bins are super small
This might be a weird observation, but why the heck are Finnish trash bins so tiny!? I mean, you have to constantly be emptying them. In Mexico and the US they have BIG trash bins that can take a lot of trash. Anyways, minor detail but still something I’ve noticed.
7. People are afraid of germs
I don’t know if this is just me, but I’ve noticed that when people in Finland drop something on the floor (in their homes) or even on the table, they decide that it’s not edible anymore. Maybe I’ve acquired a stomach of steel living in Mex, but why wouldn’t I eat something that just fell on the table for a second? Another weird thing is how people obsess over the best before dates, I mean, they’re recommendations. It’s just something printed on the product because of legislation, but it doesn’t automatically mean that the item has spoiled at that specific date. Smell it, taste it and you’ll figure it out. I don’t know, this might be a personality thing and has nothing to do with culture.
8. There are systems and apps for everything
Finnish people are Very (with a capital V) efficient. There are apps for everything and systems for everything. Every process is simple and quick and user friendly. Mobile Pay this, order your bus card with that, order food with Wolt and book your yoga class with that. I mean holy smokes.
9. Everything is so clean, there’s no dust
So fresh and so clean clean. Ha! Well, yes, in Sayulita you see people constantly sweeping the streets and watering the streets for dust control. Nope not in Finland, there are machines for this too.
10. You don’t get cat called
Even if Sayulita is a melting pot for many different cultures and has a lot of expats (or immigrants, however you wanna look at it), as a blonde woman you’ll most like encounter some sort of sexual harassment, cat calling or machismo nearly on a daily basis. Not in Finland though. Even if it’s not completely equal and there’s still a lot of work to be done, such as equal pay and the employment of women in a fertile age, I’d say it’s still a pretty decent situation to be a woman living in Finland. You very seldom have to worry for your safety or get annoyed by someone whistling at you when walking down the street to go buy an ice cream (funny weird lil fact: Finns eat the most icecream in the world).
So those are just some of the things I’ve noticed. If you have some observations yourself feel free to drop a line in the comment section below.
Con amor,
Evita